Coming home...

I left Goolwa, understanding on some level that I am in love with him and that I want to be with him...

I miss him...

Walking into my new house and collapsing on my bed in my sanctuary; a sanctuary I created all on my own... was bliss

I finally feel peace for the first time in a very long time...

Watching 'Black Swan' last night, was both the best and the worst thing I could possibly have done... It triggered an almost complete break with reality... but that, in turn, resulted in certain alters coming screaming forth and actually speaking, which has revealed what the real issues behind the current waves of insanity, are...

I am absolutely exhausted...

I actually miss him terribly right now :'(

... but I am finally where, in such a fragile state, I can be emotionally safe... I am in my bedroom... where there is beauty and light and an easy perfection... I am in a place where I can just be whatever Me I am right now without good or bad consequences; an emotional 'Switzerland' of sorts...

I am home...