Well part of it does anyway :'(
How does this keep happening?
And added to this, I have come to some emotionally devastating realisations; realisations that have left me more desolate and lonely inside than ever...
I am hoping that things will go the way I want them to (whatever that even is, I don't know)... but in the end, this situation exists regardless... and that it exists at all is the problem...
Wow! What a cruel cosmic joke... It was exactly last night the last time I had my week off that this exact same situation happened!
Whether or not things work out differently this time, while my faith in myself and my ability to survive remains unshaken and is possibly even stronger (if that is even possible), my faith in ever having a deeply happy, safe, loving future, full of wonder, is close to (if not already), completely non-existent...
And once again, I will survive it all... whether I want to or not :'(
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